Outcome of the Blog

Writing all these blogs has helped me immensely in class.  It has helped me by looking over my notes from the previous week and summing up what we talked about and what I learned from the lesson.  The blogs also helped me to see other student’s thoughts and feelings of different topics we discussed.  Overall I think the blog was a great idea.

Blended Families

We have been discussing blended families in class and the challenges that may come with these types of families.  When couples separate men are usually the first ones to get married.  Women are the ones that usually have a little bit more difficult time getting re-married when they have kids in the home.  Seventy percent of women are the ones filing for divorce most often.  When spouses do split up boys ten to fair worse than girls.  Boys are also more likely to push boundaries with their parents.  When people re-marry they may marry into a blended family.  The biological parent of a child is the ones that should hold all of the heavy discipline.  The step-parent should act like an uncle or aunt to the children.  Parents should always remember to conference behind closed doors.   Typically, it takes about two years for a blended family to reach normalcy.

Active Parenting

In a video by Michael Popkins we learned that balise has two meanings 1. The bottom of the boat which is weighed down or stabilized so the boat does not tip over. 2. That which gives stability to character.  There are four things we need to balance our character.

·         Courage: cour means strengthening of the heart.

·         Responsibility: the ability to respond.  Choices vs. consequences.

·         Cooperation: to work together.

·         Respect: to esteem.

When we use these four attributes to teach our children, while parenting, it can help to balance their character.  How we respond to our children and NOT react will determine what they learned from the experience, especially in the future. The way we teach our children now will determine their future.     

Family Dinner

     Women were put into the workforce during WWII because businesses were in need of employees.  After WWII was over, women liked the feeling of independence and earning a little extra cash for their own use.  When both parents work in the family unit there is less family togetherness, like eating dinner together.  Eating together can be a very intimate thing.  Families that eat together contribute to less criminal activity, premature sex, etc.  Family dinner is a time to share about daily experiences and what went good or bad in each other’s day.  Eating together brings a bond between children and parents that may only happen when families eat together.  I have noticed how family dinner has changed my family and have seen how my brothers and sister have implemented in their own families.  They converse about their days and also plan future activities together.  My siblings have a stronger bond with their spouses and also with their children because of eating together as a family.     

Family Council

We are asked to have a family council at least once a week with our spouse and/or children. 

The council process is:

·         Council in a group

·         Speak openly

·         Be frank with each other

·         Come to a consensus after a discussion

·         Align our will with Heavenly Fathers

·         Express love and appreciation

I like how Elder Ballard put it “There has never been a time when the world was in greater need of the strength and security that are best sown and cultivated in the deep, fertile soil of family love.  Successful families have a wide assortment of tools, and one of the most useful tools is family council.”

The concept of family council strengthening the family and bringing them closer together has remained true in my life.  Although my family and I do not council every week we would do it at least once or twice a month.   There are times when it is only my parents and I or the entire family all together around the table, but every time we do family council I feel closer to my family and a stronger bond with each one of my siblings and parents.

Change your challenges into opportunities

When handling a danger or crisis our brain can only thing of that one situation.  It is very wise to take a step back and think of that situation.  This helps us to realize not just our situation, but also others around us.  When being mindful we first need to notice what we are thinking.  Second, assess our thoughts.  Are these thoughts good or bad and will they change us for the better?  Lastly, change what you are thinking.  If you can change your mindfulness, you can change your life and your will be happier.  If we could change our challenges into opportunities we would all be so much happier and live a more fulfilling life.  

Marriage Roles

Roles that change once you get married:

·         Sharing time between in-laws

·         Daily routines or personal habits (Eating habits)

·         Sharing EVERYTHING!

·         Sleeping habits (going to bed and waking up at the same time)

·         Gender expectations

·         Birth Control (which type to use)

·         Decision Making

·         When you become married or engaged they become your best friends.  You need to let go of all your opposite gender friends.  It’s a serious boundary issue when you are too friendly with the opposite gender while married.  When you cannot draw those clear boundaries that person is not ready for marriage.  It gives people an emotional connection when talking to the opposite sex.  Don’t think you can get around it.